Hello world!
If I was a newborn program coded in some geeky-geek computer language, that’s quite possibly how I would begin my life. But that I am not!
Which probably leads you to wonder: who are you, oh intimidating, booming text? Well, lucky for you: this blog post = an FAQ! I’ll explain things as clearly as possible, so both you and I can continue to live our lives without incurring too much physical harm. Here goes.
Who in good-glory’s name are you, ya devil?
A worthwhile question, good reader; my name is Tyler Gund, and I beith an incoming student to Allegheny college, as a member of the class of 2013. A grand class (hopefully), to be sure. Before I “income,” though, I’ve got to graduate the Fieldston School, in the Bronx. I’ve gone there for 14 years. That’s a long damn time to go to one school, especially in consideration of the fact that I’m a mere 18 years old. So, leaving: it’s tough. I’m sure you empathize, though.
So, like, now I know your name and where you go to school, and all that good stuff. But what about the stuff maybe WORTH knowing?
Good call, I didn’t mention that stuff, did I? So, I’m guessing what that question really means is “what the heck are you gonna blog about, in this day-and-age?” The answer to that, my good friend, is whatever is on my mind.
“Well, what’s on your mind?” you now ask.
The answer there tends to vary, but generally: music, literature, current affairs (I’m a rather big fan of New York’s bastion of reputable journalism, The New York Times), pseudo-Science (in reality, I suck at science; science theory [whatever the hell that is], though, I rather enjoy), video games, comic books, philosophical quandaries, psychological quandaries, and other nerdy indulgences best left to social outcasts and/or the youth. I implore you to stick around, despite how uninterested you are in what is on the mind of an 18 year old man-boy. You might just find you enjoy my prose!
Well, do you speak English good? I don’t like blogs with authors what don’t speak English good!
Lucky for you, then: I’m a veritable master of the English language! I more than speak English good; in fact, I’d even go so far as to say I speak it well! I can’t guarantee that I won’t have the occasional slip-up, though. No one’s perfect, these days. It sucks, I know.
On the topic of what y’all is gonna write about: what music do you like?
Hey- a good question! I like to think I have something of an open mind when it comes to music, but I do tend toward certain types of sounds more than others. For example: I’m a gosh-darn sucker for well-executed vocal harmonization, and a good, sugary melody. This is embodied in a love for artists such as The Beatles, The Beach Boys, The Flaming Lips, Animal Collective, The Zombies, Nick Drake and Yo La Tengo.
Beyond that, I’m something of an audiophile. This isn’t to say, though, that I need to listen to music with the cleanest, crispest production values ever imagined, on laughably expensive ‘phones. I just like it when the way in which an album/song is produced contributes to the nature of the album/song. A good example of this would be my love of Pavement’s Slanted & Enchanted: many people dislike this album because it’s extraordinarily lo-fi, and sounds amateurish in some ways; I, however, love it for these qualities. It’s the definition of indie: not annoyingly ironic in its production, but rather completely honest.
So, I suppose I’m something of a timbre-phile, if you will. I’m very interested in the texture of sound, and how that influences pop music.
In addition to the groups mentioned above, I’m a big fan of such hooligans as: The Hold Steady, Led Zeppelin, TV On The Radio, The New Pornographers, and, believe it or not, even more artists! I actively pursue following “popular music,” or, the music industry. It’s a hobby. Because of that, I listen to many, many musical artists at different times.
You say you like literature, yet you are an 18 year old boy! I find that these two pieces of information conflict with one another! Prove your interest in literature, will you?
Alright, I will, you jerk. I’ve read To Kill A Mockingbird. That’s, like, a good book, right? Revered, and all that jazz? Sure, why not?
But, in all seriousness, I don’t read books as much as I should; whenever I find a book I like a lot, I’m always reminded of just how engaging reading actual books can be. On the occasions when that has happened, I’ve enjoyed immensely: To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee, The Road by Cormac McCarthy, Life of Pi by Yann Martel, Cat’s Cradle by Kurt Vonnegut, Kafka On The Shore by Haruki Murakami, and of course Ender’s Game by Orson Scott Card.
I’m a Science Fiction nut, but I also delight in, as I called it, “Science Theory;” one might also refer to it as “commercial science,” or “science lite.” This is sometimes realized in the books that I read: I got through most of Michael Alper’s The God Part of the Equation (which has had a notable influence on how I view life and the world, I might add), and am currently reading Daniel Levitin’s This Is Your Brain On Music: The Science of a Human Obsession which, as one might conclude, aligns with my rather active interest in music.
As far as general reading goes (and oh boy!, does it go), I rather enjoy the journalistic stylings of the publications Wired, Discover, Scientific American, National Geographic, Time Magazine, Newsweek, and The New Yorker. But, only on occasion with that last one.
I also have a free subscription to Entertainment Weekly, which I tend to flip through; I have suspicions as to the extortion of reviews out of Leah Greenblatt, however. Also, it’s not exactly a shining beacon of excellence in the world of print journalism. I only read shining beacons of excellence.
Well, what about current affairs? Which one is your fave, for realz?
That’s a dumb question, posed in an infantile manner. I will, however, deign to answer it: it’s impossible to answer. I can tell you the ways in which I keep myself up-to-date on current affairs, though: through the magazines I’ve just mentioned above, through news outlets such as The New York Times (http://nytimes.com), and through social, err, news outlets(?) such as Digg (http://digg.com). Mostly, though, I swear by Nicholas D. Kristof’s column in the New York Times (http://topics.nytimes.com/top/opinion/editorialsandoped/oped/columnists/nicholasdkristof/index.html), as well as Frank Rich’s http://topics.nytimes.com/top/opinion/editorialsandoped/oped/columnists/frankrich/index.html).
Well, shoot! You mentioned quite a few web-portals in that last answer to one of my questions! From this I gather that you’re a web-portal enthusiast, or internet user! I, too, am a web-portal enthusiast! Which web-portals, or websites, do you frequent??!!
That’s a hefty question, right there. Being a lazy 18 year old boy, living in the suburbs, and just finishing my second semester of my senior year in high school, I’m accessing web-portals quite often these days. There is certainly a low-down to be given, though. And by glory, I’ll give it:
Ah, good ol’ trusty. I’ve used GMail for years; the spam blocker is pretty great (aside from a certain prank beastmail incident), and Google has yet to accost me over all the illegal shit I do. Cool your jets.
Wikipedia! The free encyclopedia that anyone can edit! Except for hicks and rednecks!
JK (Rowling)! <3 you, hicks and rednecks!
A word of caution: Facebook now features Baby Boomers. Just when you thought they’d (metaphorically) die off, you really can’t get rid of ‘em!
Because how else will I find out if Ron Paul legalizes marijuana through the use of his Apple product?
I have no witty/snarky/tongue-in-cheek/flat-out-dumb remark to make about StumbleUpon. It’s just such a goddamn bad name. Jesus christ. It’s got some good links, though. Interesting vignettes of life on the web, if you will.
Sort of like StumbleUpon for the inner web designer/graphic designer/web enthusiast in all of us. Actually, just for huge geeks.
Cracked was once a “humor magazine;” now it’s a website dedicated to sporadically interesting/funny lists made by a bunch of burly men-idealizing manboys who like anything remotely describable as “badass.” But really, how else would I know of the existence of the Drilldo?
Some (generally) useless piece of crap to be purchased on the cheap everyday! To be perfectly honest, I’ve never actually bought anything from the darn site. It’s nice to want things though, eh?
This one’s a ‘lil bit of a cop-out, but their t-shirts are generally so high quality that I think it bears mentioning.
Better than Pandora. In fact, best music-related internet resource. ’Nuff said.
Kind of like this thing, except within a 140 character limit. Currently, this post is clocking in at 1,523. Twitter exists so that when I’m sitting down, you can be sure you’ll know it!
They categorize music well in their reviews. Their layout is a steaming pile of poop; think of their categorizations as the happy, bright yellow indigestible corn amongst the ugly, brown poo.
These kids listen to a lot of obscure shit. That’s pretty cool, though. There’s a lot of music what gets made, these days.
The man’s been doing the whole movie thing for a good bit, and I happen to think he does it pretty well. Also, his blog is – wait for it – thought provoking. He also likes to talk a lot about how much he advocates evolution. I like to do that as well.
A man’s gotta love his gadgets, eh? LAWLZ. Seriously though, Gizmodo’s great.
1Up is rather good at that whole video game coverage thing. So, when I need help with those frivolous joys, I go to 1Up.
Those are enough websites to visit for now, eh? Sure, sometimes I hop by YouTube or College Humor, but it’s not every day (or so).
Alright, that’s a good chunk of information for now. But, one exception to your list of “interests” has got me befuddled: you’re an 18 year old boy, and yet you don’t profess interest in some sort of sport? What gives, imposter?!
Nah, I ain’t an imposter, I assure you. I enjoy sports- baseball is as American as the right to bear arms, basketball is good fun, I still enjoy a rousing game of tennis, football is a game for champions, and hockey is just awesome; yet, I don’t follow any of these great games, nor do I really play any of them much. I’m very apologetic, especially if this seems somewhat paradoxical to you. If it helps, I still really enjoy a good bowl of Chili.
So, at nearly a whopping 1,900 words, there you have it! If you’ve gotten this far, you either get a pat on the back for being such a good sport, or a smack in the face for wasting so much damn time reading this. It’s your prerogative, really.
1 Comment
May 19, 2009 at 9:15 pm
Yeah, so that’s cool, but what’s up with that banner? I see no reference to it (or, for that matter, to barking dawgs/dawg/dog/dogs) in your frequently requested queries section, and so I am at a loss, if you will, as to its relevance with regards to the content that currently exists and will in the future be produced on this here log on the neberwets (“nlog”).
Also, I know for a fact that you do not, in fact, possess a Masters Degree (MA) in the Englishes, so for you to proclaim yourself a “veritable master” of English is a fallacy. Whilst it is factual that your grasp of the language is nice and goodly, this does not make you a master of it.
Anyway, I look forward to the future productions to be presented on this internet. Godspeed, my good(ly) sir or madam.